


Taste

by YuMe89



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Emotional Eating, First Kiss, Ineffable Dumbasses (Good Omens), Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), Mention of Housplants, Other, Snake Business
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 13:38:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19993111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YuMe89/pseuds/YuMe89
Summary: The title makes it seem dirtier than it is. It's not in any way naughty.---------Crowley eats a lot, to get rid of a specific taste.





	Taste

Nice little restaurants were really just Aziraphales thing, for the most part anyway. Crowley wasn't much of an eater, but when he did eat, it was more in a 'eat your feelings' kind of way.

He was alone, that was in itself uncommon these days, but he needed a breather. Hopefully, Aziraphale would never know, that he needed time away from him, he didn't want to hurt his Angel. 

This pure, happy celestial being, that made him feel all sorts of things, he rather not felt. Crowley was good in denial, he perfected it, but sometimes, even he had to take a step back from an emotional situation, he shouldn't even have emotions about in the first place.

He practically gorged down the spaghetti before him in one go, his serpentine nature allowing him to do so without the need to bite down. Crowley got odd looks from a few other people around him, until he miracled himself uninteresting for them. 

The second dish, a fine bloody steak with potatoes on the side, came and went away just as quickley as his spaghetti had. Normally he disliked sugary stuff, if you didn't count the occasional lollypop or icecone, but he was in the mood for a big chocolate cake. A whole cake, not just a slice of it. Although, he knew the following sugar high would make it nearly impossible to nap properly, he took the risk anyway. He could just counter it with a blunt or two.

The waiter had been a bit reluctant to bring him a whole cake, but Crowley persuaded him to just bring the damn cake already. Not in those words, mind you. 

As it arrived, his eyes got impossibly bigger. He was going to savor this, getting rid of the smell that had etched itself without permission in his nose and therefore his tastebuds. No matter how much he wolfed down, he didn't lose Aziraphales smell. He had been dumb enough to lounge around as a snake, just to be found by Aziraphale. The fatally stupid thing he did, as a snake, had been letting his tongue out and whisper over the Angels wrist. 

Aziraphales cooing sounds he made, while picking Crowley up, didn't really help. He had just wanted to sunbath in one of the windows, something he definitely wouldn't do ever again.

The Angel had told him how pretty he was and how much he liked his pattern and the smooth scales. He was tempted to bite him then and there, but held himself back. It might've to do with his intoxication tasting his bestfriend like that and really paying attention afterwards.

More like obsessing, but whatever. 

Crowley looked at the fork, then back at his cake, back to the fork. It was a bit too small for his tastes. As no one watched, he miracled it a bit bigger. Would help with the shoving.

If he was lucky, he'd just suffocate on the damn cake and never had to deal with all those... _feelings_ again. Hell surely wouldn't provide him with a new body after all and he would rod in Hell, never seeing Aziraphale again. His eyes went wide again, this time for other reasons.

Nope, no shoving. His situation sure wasn't ideal, but still a lot better, than being in Hell. 

He took a bite of the cake, shuddering upon the sweetness in his mouth. Aziraphale would like this. Crowley closed his eyes, he needed to stop thinking about the blessed Angel, at least for five minutes. Couldn't be so hard, right?

Halfway through the cake, thinking about absolutely nothing, he got the idea to take it to Aziraphale. Growning, he let his head fall onto the tablecloth, missing the cake by mere inches. 

"Sir, are you alright?", the waiter came over hurriedly, sounding a bit worried.

"Yesssss.", the demon said, fixing the poor bugger with one eye, over the brim of his glasses. "Jusssst...peachy."

The man hurried away just as quickly as he had come. Crowley lifted his head and ate the rest. He dabbed his mouth clean and downed his glass of wine, red, went well with the chocolate.

When he looked down on himself, his belly was obnoxiously big in his tight fitted clothes. He looked a bit pregnant. That thought made him laugh. Absurd, a pregnant demon. 

Crowley paid and went home, just to lie down. As predicted, he couldn't fall asleep. Lying on his back, his stomach looked even more prominent and he started to caress it. "My food baby...", he murmured, bordering on affecionate, into the stillness of his flat.

In the end, he did fall asleep, without any further help from his collection of drugs.

His dreams were messy and strange. In one of them he dreamt about being a large serpent, nothing out of the ordinary, but he was laying eggs, which was not normal. And the things coming out of those eggs weren't normal either. It weren't small snakes, but some hybrid of demon and angel, looking a lot like Aziraphale.

He woke with a start. That settled it, he wasn't going to eat that much ever again. 

Crowley looked at his phone, realizing, he had been asleep for a whole week. No missed calls. Well, he would just pretend it didn't hurt and it won't.

With slumped shoulders, he began to aggressivly spray his plants with water. Not really in the mood to berate and threaten them. 

When he was finished, he went into his bathroom to clean himself.

As he sauntered back into his office, he saw his answering machine light blink steadily. Ten new messages. He pressed the button.

" _....Hello?...Crowley?...does this even work? Do you hear me? Oh-!_ ", loud clattering ended the first message. Obviously his phone must've fallen to the ground. It was very disheveled Aziraphale.

The next one seemed to be not that long after the first. " _Blasted thing! Oh, not you Crowley, where are you dear? Please call me back, when you hear this._ "

Without much time between the messages, just a soft beep and there it was again, Aziraphales voice. " _Hello there, Crowley, can you please call me back, so I know your machine does work? I'm still not sure it really does..._ ", what Aziraphale really meant was 'Please tell me you're okay' and he just slept right through it.

Beep. " _....Crowley? Can you pick up the phone please? I know you're there!...Well, I hope you are...or not...If you're there and not picking up, than I get the impression you're ignoring me. Did I do something?_ ", at first his voice was stern and Crowley thought he was a bit angry, but to the end he just sounded sad.

Beep. " _.....I'm drunk....this is not the same without you..._ ", that was all, the whole message. Aziraphale had drunk dialed him. 

Beep. " _....No! I don't acco- acct- accept t'is silence. I demand you ca- coo- call me back!_ ", okay, that seemed to be the same day and it was fucking adorable.

Beep. " _'M'sorry. 'M a bad angel. Please?_ ", yeah, go ahead and break his fucking heart, why don't you? Crowley wanted to call him back instantly, but he wanted to know what the other voicemails contained.

Beep." _So, I was at your flat today and you didn't open. Are you really not there or just that good at ignoring me? Did I offend you in any way? I don't know what I said yesterday while I was drunk, I'm sorry for bothering you._ "

Beep." _Hey...Gabriel was here, telling me I could come back to Heaven. I'm not sure if I should take his offer, but if you really don't want to be my friend anymore, I might consider it._ "

Crowley stopped the last voicemail from playing automatically, dreading Aziraphales decision. He held his breath. Why would his Angel even think about such a stupid idea? The Heavenly Host had never treated him like an equal. Belittling and making fun of him, while Aziraphale did his best to be the Angel God would want. 

Clentching his teeth, he pressed the button. 

Beep." _Good Evening Mister Cowwley, this is Teresa speaking, I would like to talk to you about-_ ", Crowley stopped the voicemail. So, Aziraphale didn't tell him goodbye, which meant he hadn't decided yet. 

The demon got up from his throne and moved in long strides towards his door. Bugger his feelings, he wouldn't lose his damn Angel over his own incompetence to act like a good friend. 

As he slid behind the wheel of his Bentley, he thought about what he would say and was instantly aware, he couldn't tell him, that he had been asleep all the while. Well, he could, but then he had to explain why and... whatever. He would just tell him, his answering machine was broken and he just woke up from an unplanned nap. Yes, that sounded like something he would do. 

He put his car into gear and rushed to his friends bookshop. 

Crowley thought it best, just to be himself, playing it cool like always. Opening the door, the familiar jingle of the bell told Aziraphale about his presence.

He sealed the deal with a loud "Angel!", startling Aziraphale a bit, as he approached from the backroom. "Oh, Crowley...uhm...what are you doing here?", he asked, his face turning red, obviously embarressed.

"Didn't we have dinner plans? I apologize, my answering machine broke and I must've slept through a full week as it seems. Did you try to call me?", he said, looking around the bookshop. It didn't look any different than before, so he wasn't packing up to go back to Heaven?

Aziraphales mouth opened and closed, processing the new information. "Once or twice, I guess." The demons eyebrows raised involuntarily at that. His Angel was capable of lying. He had nine voicemails on his recorder, that told him a different story. 

"I hope I didn't worry you too much. It's not like Hell came over and grabbed me to finish the job.", he laughed a bit, goating Aziraphale, but nothing happened. No tale about Gabriel, not a single word.

"Oh dear, I wasn't worried, I figured you must've been asleep.", the Angel said, busying himself with a stack of books. Putting it from one side to the other.

Crowleys eyes turned to slits, as he watched him carefully, sauntering over and ever so slightly rounded him. "Really? Okay, then. How was your week? Terrorized your customers?", he asked, watching Aziraphales every move.

"I don't terrorize.", the Angel sniffed, returning his look rather heatedly. 

"What about dinner?", Crowley asked, looking over his glasses. The Angel seemed to stop moving at last, considering the demons proposition.

"I don't feel peckish at the moment.", he said finally, returning to his task, whatever that was. Crowley didn't know why Aziraphale was acting so strange and not telling him about his encounter with Heaven. 

"Angel, what's wrong? You usually don't turn down a dinner invitation...". He pried. Aziraphale sighed slightly and turned towards him. "Nothing.", was his answer.

Not in the mood to play this game any longer, he took off his glasses and stared Aziraphale down. "The answering machine isn't broken, I heard your voicemails.", he stated, earning himself a shocked look.

"You lied to me!", the Angel accused him, all but pointing at him. Crowley just raised a single eyebrow.

"I'm a demon, it's what we do. You lied too. As it seems, even more than once.", he said starting to round the angel again.

"Yes, well...Why didn't you call back?", Aziraphale said, picking at his waistcoat, not looking him in the eye.

"Because I was asleep, that wasn't a lie! And once I had heard the voicemails, there was no point in calling, I decided to come over instead."

"Oh...you heard all of them?", the Angel said, looking a bit shifty. 

"Yeah, all of them. So what's with Gabriel?", Crowley asked, curious to no end. 

"Uhm, yes, well, I might've stretched the truth a tiny bit on that topic.", Aziraphale said, still looking anywhere but Crowley, wringing his hands nervously. 

"You? Stretching the truth? How much exactly?", it amused Crowley to no end, he couldn't supress his smirk. 

"To- to be honest, it never happened.", a scared look at last, was what Crowley got.

"So you lied to me? In a voicemail...what did you think would happen?", the demon couldn't really comprehend what was happening. Why would Aziraphale lie to him about something like this?

"I don't know, can we not talk about this, please?", he sounded as desperate as he looked. Ashamed, his Angel was ashamed, because he lied. 

"No, I want to know, what you thought would happen, after telling me this? You obviously thought, I ignored you willingly...so...?", Crowley just couldn't understand his Angel. Were they friends or were they not? He did sound sad about the possibility that they weren't. Wasn't his Angel able to see the pretty fucking huge torch he was carrying for him? Or was that the reason Aziraphale didn't want to put a label on them, too afraid Crowley would twist something innocent into something else?

The Angel closed his eyes, defeated. "I thought, you found something out about me and didn't want to be around me anymore...but I missed you, I know, a week is nothing for immortal beings like us, but it felt like forever and I thought, maybe if you...if you thought, Heaven would take me away from Earth, you would at least come and talk to me again...I'm sorry, I lied."

Holy fuck, that was not what Crowley had expected. He stood there, floored by Aziraphales confession, then the first sentence came to mind again. "What exactly was I supposed to find out about you? Do you have striped bowties or something? That is not a secret, Angel, but a refreshing change in clothing."

"N-No, I don't have striped bowties.", the Angel stated irritated, frowning just a bit. 

"Then what? I know for a fact, your cellar is full of alcohol, not corpses. Just tell me, it can't be so bad.", he opened his arms, waiting for the big revealing statement.

"Co-Corpses, why would I-"-"It's a figure of speech...well, in most cases anyway."

It was silent for a while, Aziraphale fridgeted around, unsure what to do with his hands. Crowley put his back into his too small pockets, waiting for his Angel to spit it out. There was a loud intake of air, then, nothing. A second try.

"I might have...developed certain...uhm, no, _a_ certain emotion for you.", the Angel said, not making any more sense than before.

"Hate? Disgust? Irritation? What exactly, I can take it, just tell me, Angel.", if it was any of those emotions, he really, really couldn't. 

"Love.", was all Aziraphale said, sounding strangled, like he couldn't breath. It was not that he had to, so Crowley wasn't too concerned. He was more curious, where the sudden highpitched tone came from. Oh, that was him. He closed his mouth quickly. Humming instead now.

"I'm sorry, Crowley. I never wanted to make you feel uncomfortable.", the Angel murmured, sporting a sorrowful expression.

Crowley regained his power over his body back, no longer frozen to the spot, he took his hands out of his pockets and walked over to Aziraphale, taking said Angels face in both of his palms.

"You're so, so stupid, Angel.", he said, at a loss for words, the blond head he held nodded.

"I know, I'm rather dumb, aren't I?", still unbearable sadness in his voice.

"Yeah and I love every bit of you and your stupidity.", it took a while for Crowleys words to sink in, but heaven, as they did, those hazel eyes shone so bright, the demon thought in all those millenia he hadn't seen anything so beautiful before. 

"Oh, Crowley...", was all he said, before inching closer towards the demon before him. 

Their noses bumped into each other and they laughed, until their lips met, finally. The contact took their breath away. Not that they needed it anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> Aziraphale is a drunk dialer, you can't convince me otherwise. If he knew how to text, it would've been even more embarressing. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! <3


End file.
